Hello!
So, we had this idea...
whynotpoet.com takes the story you have in your head and wraps it around the heart of another - through poetry. Know someone who would love a poem? We got you. Are we any good at it? We identify as poets, so what else could you need? (Okay, click the button below for a few stanzas of earlier commissions.)
Let's brainstorm a bit, shall we?
1. Tell us about your story.
You're celebrating a person, a group of people, a milestone birthday, the anniversary of an employee or the business itself, you want to roast a person or group, you want to document an unbelievably hilarious event, or need a special way to let someone know you care. You want to propose, you want to quit your job (with style), someone's retiring, you love/despise this team, you're offering a eulogy, you're speaking at a rehearsal dinner, you're a secret admirer, you want to apologize, you want to vent, you want them to always know and never forget that they're special. And of course, there are the Special 7 : Mother's Day, Thanksgiving, Veteran's Day, Father's Day, Christmas, July 4th, and Easter. Or if none of the above, you tell us ! What is so important that it just has to be shared through poetic verse?
2. Just a few Ideas to help personalize your story.
* Who or what, is this poem about? Name(s), age(s), relationship to you?
* Are you writing about something that happened that must be retold?
* Who will this poem be from? If anonymous, please explain.
* Who else needs to be mentioned in this poem and why?
* Any special nicknames for the person/people you're writing about?
* Any favorite quotes, quirks, fears, dislikes to include?
* Any inside jokes that need to be referenced? (Will want to know context.)
* Hobbies or interests that need to be included?
* Secret desires, ambitions, pastimes, bad habits?
* What makes this person special?
* How would you describe them to someone who doesn't know them?
* What absolutely has to be included in this poem?
* Anything we need to avoid? (If applicable, and just to be on the safe side.)
3. Describe the purpose of this story.
* I want this person to feel...or to know...or to always...or to never...
* I want to say I love you, thank you, I'm sorry, I will never forget, will always appreciate, couldn't do it without you, am better off because of you, will never let you live this down, always want to keep laughing about, etc.
4. Describe the tone of the story.
* I want them to laugh. I want them to cry - all in the same poem.
* This story, told correctly, will require you to be borderline inappropriate.
* It should be lighthearted and silly throughout. It's for a child.
* This is a heartfelt tribute. I want them to know they're loved.
* Sincere and appropriate for the topic being discussed.
* There's no way you could offend them. (But please try. It's a roast!)
* In a word: funny, encouraging, sentimental, apologetic, direct, etc.
5. How would you complete this sentence?
This would be the best poem ever if...
Okay, I know what story I want to tell! Now what do I do?
Send us an email through the Contact Us section at the top of the site (or click on the pencil) and include your contact information along with the details you want us to consider in the telling of your story. You can tell the story in a paragraph or two, or three, or you can write it in bullet points. Doesn't matter how you do it, just give us your story. Be clear about what's most important to you and know what you're hoping to accomplish with this poem.
We will confirm receipt of your request and will set up a quick call just to make sure we know exactly what you want to say and how you want to say it.
The length of your poem will be determined, not surprisingly, by how long it takes to tell the story. Typically, poems range from 5 to 20 stanzas. A stanza will contain 4 lines, rhyming on the 2nd and 4th unless otherwise noted. If you'd like a hard stop after a certain amount of stanzas, let us know.
For example: Maybe you're looking for something a little different - not like ransom note different - but perhaps a "take no prisoners, fewer words the better, mic drop" moment that says it all. We got you.
After the call, you will receive a written recap of the scope and projected completion date as well as payment details for 50% of the total payment. Writing begins upon receipt of this payment. Once your poem is ready, you will be notified in writing and your poem delivered upon receipt of the remaining balance due.
So what if I see something I really want to change?
No problem! Our goal is to deliver exactly what you're hoping for.
What else do I need to know?
whynotpoet.com will not be a platform for bullying, sacrilege, or lunacy. whynotpoet.com reserves the right to turn down any submission that hints at the above. We're not easily offended, mind you, we're just not in to the above.
Payment: $50
The base price for your customized poem is $50. This price includes a printed copy of your poem and a digital .pdf version through email or on your very own thumb drive. Woohoo! (We'll even provide the drive.)
Looking to step up the presentation? (Prices below reflect total cost.)
* The Lewis: Poet provides a digital audio recording of your poem. $75
* The Foreman: Poet recites your poem in person**. Presented in character if need be. Price is subject to how crazy the idea is and how much cash you have. We'll start this one off at $125.
* The Phillips: Your poem recorded as a song. (Let's discuss.) $150
* The Smith: Poet performs your song in person**.
Seeing a band live vs. listening to the CD. Your call. Encore included if you're nice. These are typically chosen for group settings where several may be contributing to the gift. $200
And by the way...if you can tell us who the four presentation options are named after, your poem is 50% off. (No participation trophies for partially correct responses.)
** If you've requested either the Phillips or Smith live performance option, the presentation date will need to be reserved as far in advance as possible. Prices subject to change for travel, props, animals and foreign languages. (Foreign languages include: Spanish, and what people speak who aren't from the south.)
Typically, poems can be written within a week's time. (We'll let you know if that's not the case.) Need it like...now? We can talk. Life doesn't always happen according to schedule. We get it. Just get out your wallet.
whynotpoet.com was created to give a unique voice to those people, places, events, thoughts and feelings deserving of special recognition. If it's important enough to say it, why not poet?
"There's something about a poem that speaks to the soul. And if you're not sure what I'm talking about, you might not have one."
The Poet
Click the pic to get started!
Billy wrote a song for our beloved school's farewell party. We howled and sang along together as he performed. He said all of the things that we couldn’t in the most delightful way. Billy, you are an artist! Thank you for sharing your God-given talent with the world! It was the greatest gift!
2019 Montana Magnet School Faculty
One of our friends was diagnosed with cancer. We wanted a lighthearted, fun ditty to explain how much she meant to us all. With a little information, Billy created a sweet and hilarious poem that was personalized for our precious friend. He is truly gifted with words. I am forever grateful!
Ashley Adkinson
YOU ARE AMAZING!!! [Before giving it to Tom] I read it to a group of people I’m with and we are all crying!! You did such an amazing job! He loved it!! I couldn't read it because every time I do it makes me cry. Such an incredible poem!! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!
Allison D. from Atlanta, GA.
BILLY MCCARTHY! This is the best thing ever!!! Thank you so much! I know they’re going to LOVE IT!!!
Meredith A. from Ozark, AL.
I truly enjoy your ability to "know" the words will come and the finished product will be amazing and fruitful! Thank you, thank you, thank you! Can't wait to work with you again!
Mikelyn B. from Dothan, AL.
